D.I.Y. Gosney Strikes Again

The Do-It-Yourselfing continues over at the Gosney household has we have been emboldened by last week's successes. This week, light fixtures! But first, some back story.

The time is 2005. Sharon has just purchased her first home and is in love with everything about it, except the battleship gray paint in every room. She decides to take a week off work and, with the help of her roommate, paints every square inch of the house -- including the master bath. In the master bath are some hideous light fixtures which must come down and so she asks for the help of a friend in removing them. Unfortunately the hideous light fixtures were poorly installed and large gaping holes are revealed behind the fixtures. Sharon vows to find some better fixtures and have them installed as soon as she finishes painting. By the time she makes it to painting the master bath, however, she is exhausted and quite possibly impaired from the effects of huffing house paint for a solid week. Therefore, she only manages one scraggly coat of paint before calling the project complete.

Fast-forward to 2006. Matt and Sharon have began dating. Many promises of home-improvement tasks are made by Matt in an effort to look impressive, including the repair of the light fixtures. After marriage these promises are promptly forgotten.

Fast-forward to mid-2008. Matt and Sharon have, in fact, repainted several of the rooms in the home already and at last tackle the master bath. They repaint the master bath, this time with the appropriate two coats of paint, and say that perhaps this is the year they will finally address the giant holes in the wall that are so large some creature could easily crawl through. Probably right as Matt gets out of the shower.

Fast-forward to Friday. Matt and Sharon visit Lowes to look at light fixtures again. This is an activity they have done in the past to make themselves feel like they might actually address the bathroom issue. Unlike previous visits, however, they actually purchase light fixtures. Matt is convinced the correct approach is to hire an electrician to install these new fixtures. Sharon asks the teen-age cashier how hard they are to install to which the cashier replies that she installed some herself for her grandmother and that they were quite easy. The take-home message, of course, is that a teen-age girl is more handy than Matt.

Fast-forward one last time to Saturday. Matt, feeling brave due to last week's blinds success and not wanting to be found less capable than a Hannah Montana fan, dutifully reads the instructions on how to install light fixtures while also ensuring that his life insurance policy is paid to date. Miraculously, after one emergency visit to the hardware store (electrical tape) and no curse words uttered, Matt and Sharon managed to install the light fixtures (and they work!) Matt feels this is a good time to retire from the D.I.Y. scene, going out on top.

Hope everyone is well!